I have lived many lives within the experience of this life, this manifestation, this cosmic chapter…
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I have walked in fear and I have walked in strange places with maps and instructions that were given to me with directions that only served to keep me lost and confused as I retraced my steps in insane, non-sensical loops that led to no where for years…
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I have walked in places that were arid and so hot and I have walked in places where the winds blew and screamed and I was all alone and I couldn’t find one sign that was familiar and I couldn’t remember my own name. I have walked in places where the shadows would whisper bad things and I knew that if I slowed down to listen their whispery stories would eventually become…plausible.
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I have walked in places with knees that gave way under the heavy weight the the “Mantle of the Unfamiliar” passed onto me from the fathers of the fathers of my father…
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Then…in spite of, as a result of, and nevertheless, one day:
**Love Changed the Game!**
And when Love spoke with it’s sovereign, immutable Authority, then and only then was I able to divest myself of that sickly sweet “Mantle of the Unfamiliar” that was never mine to be carrying anyway. Love stepped in and received my broken powerlessness and lifted me and kissed me and with one breath and ALL POWER, blew away those “years sown in tears” and suffering was only for suffering’s sake. GONE!!
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I stand here this morning bowed so low with humble praise and thanksgiving for the “cool sips” of nourishment and fortification that Love is faithful to provide me on this journey of “following God around the corner…to the places I cannot see.” I stand here, convinced yet again, that if I just continue to walk, crawl, drag…my self to the Edge of the Abyss, EVERYDAY and unflinchingly and unabashedly FLING my will and my life into the Current of Life-all I have to do is ride the waves of Healing, Redemption, and Restoration! That’s it. My life has very little to do with “Lisa” and what she thinks anyway. It’s LOVE”S story and LOVE brings the bells, whistles, and SALVATION and TRANSFORMATION. My job is to merely “stand , “believe”, and “uphold” the Victorious Banner of the One who WAS before Time could be counted and IS until the infinite ends of eternity…
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And because life in this temporal realm continues with resolute certainty to be governed by the “powers of the air,” we then are required to still eek out an existence among the lost, the deceived, the hurting and the one’s who are intent on hurting… And IN THE VERY SAME HOUR of experiencing the miracle of being a living witness to all the dry bones that began to shake and rattle and pull together with divine intention and deliberation to create a WHOLE more glorious than our fragmented part could ever be…I am so grateful that the One to is Love in it’s purest essence was sure to fill me and fortify me with its healing, restorative elixirs of LIFE and WHOLENESS so that when it was time to come face to face with the very one’s to which I was born…in the face of eyes that went flat as they darted to any place but my face and lips that refused to even speak my name and acknowledge my presence in the room and arms that reached over me and around me, denying me any comforting embraces as if I were merely a ghost in the room…I was able to stand in the confidence because I knew I was coming in the name of a power far greater than I. I was able to stand, without rage and the raw pain that used to drive me in to frenzied displays of incoherent rants. The familiar need to fall into the bent postures of proving and providing “proof” of my worthiness had simply fallen away.
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In the midst of unspeakable tragedy to a family that now lies shorn in the glare of loss and grief, Love. Love stepped in and allowed a moment of respite. Love showed mercy and gifted us who had prayed fervent prayers for extra portions of guidance and wisdom and grace…Love allowed genuine laughter for the very first time to people who never EVER knew that was a possibility. Love started to speak words that our children had never heard and it did so with vigor! Love allowed me, finally, to simply stand in strength and confidence and connectedness of my position in the world and hold my grandgirl’s hand and understand a bit better than I did the day before, that the “work” of it all isn’t mine anyway. Love provided a deeper, more richly textured definition of what actually will “draw all men unto Me…” Love said, “I will prick and convict and affect change but only if you stand in position and LIVE like you BELIEVE.”
Love…changed the ebb and flow of some eternal ripples that I was once convinced could never be changed. Love didn’t need to be rationed and divided and parceled out to us last night. Love just welled and swelled and overflowed and splashed all of us who were willing to wade in it’s currents and it washed away old scabs and scars and it healed and restored and made better and more beautiful that which we had abandoned in fear and frustration many years ago. Love left us with Hope…
Love Changed the Game…
Ruby TruthSeeker
#storyteller
All Rights Reserved. Lisa Seward-Partee/Ruby TruthSeeker. 2017.